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38 J-Term Thoughts (And How to Solve Them with Falcon Feud)

Madeline Crocenzi

J-Term: that wonderful and weird 15 days before Spring Semester. It’s a fun and relaxing time for those of us in skiing classes, attempting to master guitar, or creating some art masterpiece only our mom thinks is beautiful. For the poor suckers in philosophy, animal form and function, or quite frankly any class involving numbers, J-Term is 15 days of sheer torture.

To avoid the repetition of standard J-Term days, come out to Falcon Feud on January 21st in the Union! Compete with your team to win a cash prize or just come out for some cookies, popcorn, and pretzels, a chance to win gift cards, and an opportunity to see a “Steve Harvey” who doesn’t announce the wrong winner.

1. We meet again, J-Term. I. Will. Be. Motivated.

2. I should take a morning class to get it out of the way.

3. But if I take an afternoon class I can get up early and go to the gym.

4. Eh, I’ll start the gym routine tomorrow morning.

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5. Wow, think of how much reading I can get done before class starts at 1.

6. But only five more episodes of The Office…

7. I’ll just do both at the same time. I’m a great multi-tasker!

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8. “… the problem of evil… free will defense… OMG IS JIM PROPOSING?!”

9. No big deal I’ll just skim the reading at lunch.

10. How is it 12:00 already? I’ll just throw on some sweats and head to Lottie quick.

11. Wow, it’s crowded. I’ll just keep walking around until a table opens up.

12. It’s a good thing I didn’t go to the gym; this is a workout in itself.

13. Maybe if I stare at them uncomfortably they’ll eat faster.

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14. YES, open seat. Awkwardness always works.

15. Hello random wrestler next to me with arms the size of my entire body.

16. No, you’re not bothering me… you’re just TAKING UP ALL OF MY ARM SPACE.

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17.The claustrophobia is too real right now.

18. Finally, time to go. Let me just put on 50 layers of winter clothing in six inches of space.

19. This walk to the dish tray is worse than the time Indiana Jones had to make it to that golden idol.

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20. I will not trip. I will not trip. I will not… oh man, that peanut butter pie looks good. Dang it, didn’t see that backpack.

21. Ugh finally made it. I must’ve been born a natural athlete.

22. Alright, time to go to class. #gameface

23. It feels like an eternity’s gone by. It’s got to be at least 2:00.

24. 1:15?!?! You’ve got to be kidding.

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25. Oh no, no one’s answering the prof’s question. Do. Not. Make. Eye. Contact.

26. Break time! I wonder what would happen if I didn’t come back…

27. Too risky.

28. This will all be over soon. Maybe we’ll get out early.

29. 3:55. Gee, thanks for those extra five minutes.

30. I’ll just do my homework now to get it over with.

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31. Maybe just one more hour of Netflix first.

32. I wonder what’s going on around campus tonight…

33. Oh right, it’s J-Term, NOTHING is going on.

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34. Back to Netflix.

35. What, there’s no way it’s already 11:30.

36. I’m feeling strangely tired for doing nothing all day.

37. I’ll just do the reading tomorrow.

38. You win again, J-Term.

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Don’t forget to come out to Falcon Feud this Thursday at the Union to beat the J-Term monotony! Netflix can wait.

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